Be Proud of Grit

In the last eleven months, I have become acutely aware of the concerned reactions from strangers when I say I am a mom of three young children, and I work full time. Many times, I do not go on to explain that I am co-founder of the company. And rarely do I explain that my company is on the most recent Inc 5000 list. The next question I frequently receive is “How do you do it?”

After going through a few of these interactions, I found myself unable to shrug my shoulders and brush off the concerned looks. I started worrying. Do they know something I don’t? Am I doing something that is detrimental to my children or to myself or to my business?

Before diving too deep into a spiral of concern, I researched. As any well-trained CPA and finance professional, I went straight to the facts and numbers.

Are there other women doing what I am doing? Is success even possible when juggling both?

I found women. Moms. Founders. Who came before me. Clearing a path. And to these women, I am grateful.

Always the Numbers

First, let’s define “grit”.  The best definition I found is from GoStrengths: “a personality trait possessed by individuals who demonstrate passion and perseverance toward a goal despite being confronted by significant obstacles and distractions.” But the word “grit” was originally made famous by Angela Duckworth.

The following women are ones that have impacted my growth as a mom founder. These women simultaneously built major companies while also raising young children. Massively successful founders who are also moms. Women with grit.

Estee Lauder, an iconic entrepreneur, was the first female founder I was inspired by in my early entrepreneurship days. Some think success is handed out. But success takes preparation. And preparation takes grit. Estee Lauder has a famous quote that I clung to in the early days and still cling to now, “If you love to work and you have a goal, you’ll get there. I didn’t get there by wishing for it or dreaming about it or hoping for it. I got there by working for it."

• Established Motherhood (1933); Mom of 2
• Established Estee Lauder (1946)
• Estate Worth: $33 Billion

Sara Blakely, is my modern day entrepreneurial role model. She infamously built her billion-dollar company, Spanx, without receiving a single dollar of investor funding. Scrappy. She started with only $5,000 in her bank account. Determination. She sold a majority stake of this business in 2021 and closed with an all-women deal team at Blackstone. And if you follow her on any social media platform, she hilariously shows realities of motherhood and being a boss (inside out dresses when on Good Morning America, kids using her Fortune cover edition to kill a cockroach in the house, spilling drinks while presenting on a major video conference). She humanizes Mom Boss!

• Established Motherhood (2009); Mom of 4
• Established Spanx (2000)
• Net Worth: $1.3 Billion

Reese Witherspoon – Founder of Hello Sunshine. She’s proven she’s not just a pretty face. She has shown the world a pretty face can have serious brains! During her movie career she was told to save up her dollars because when she reached 40, her acting jobs wouldn’t be plentiful. Instead, she self-funded a production company and is working more in her 40s than she ever has. She spoke a couple years ago about her journey, “I decided to invest in myself…I kept showing up and betting on myself. I am my own best lottery ticket.”

• Established Motherhood (1999); Mom of 3
• Solidified Career (1999); Established Companies (2013 & 2016)
• Net Worth: $440 Million

Rihanna – I saved this powerhouse as my final highlight in this series as her story is very personal to my recent pregnancy. Rihanna is my standing ovation!

Yes, Rihanna had a tremendous career in music and entrepreneurship before going on the motherhood journey. Beyond all this, I will argue that performing Super Bowl LVII Halftime Show in 2023 while pregnant counts for hustling in your career while raising young children. Grit. I applaud Rihanna for showing the world that pregnancy and motherhood do not slow down women’s ambitions nor abilities. Pregnancy does not alter our drive nor potential. And Rihanna exemplified this to the world.

Super Bowl LVII in February 2023 brought a triumph to my then-pregnant self. Going through 3 pregnancies and one miscarriage, the business world is not kind to pregnant women. Just four months earlier, I had been removed as a member of a subgroup of an international entrepreneurs’ organization when I disclosed my pregnancy and inability to travel to an international, developing country for a variety of medical reasons. That moment, when I was kicked out of the subgroup for having a medical moment as a pregnant woman, was highly impactful on me and part of my own personal grit story. But that story is not for today. Today is about finding comfort in my experience watching Rihanna as she sang and danced her pregnant self around that Super Bowl stage. Owning her pregnancy and her exceptional talent in front of 121 million viewers.

So, Rihanna, I thank you for giving me the feeling of triumph that pregnant women don’t need to be forced to leave. Or sit down. Or slow down. Together, we can continue to pave the road for the next generation of women. That their experiences will be better than our own.

I thank you for showing the world that pregnant women are so very powerful.

In Rihanna’s words, “when you become a mom there is something that just happens where you feel like you can take on the world, you can do anything."

• Established Motherhood (2022); Mom of 2
• Established Career (2005)
• Net Worth: $1.4 Billion

Other grit-filled mom founders to read up on: Tory Burch (mom of 3), Whitney Wolfe Herd (mom of 2); Joanna Gaines (mom of 5), Rebecca Minkoff (mom of 4), Kendra Scott (mom of 3), Ariana Huffington (mom of 2), Julie Sweet (mom of 2), Indra Nooyi (mom of 2), and so many more.

The Next Step

Rather than being shocked that mothers can run businesses (or hold major leadership positions at companies) recognize the leadership skills that mothers have cultivated. Mothers have leadership strengths that are hard to train. And mothers have done it through baptism by fire. Mothers are exceptionally good at delegating. We have no choice but to delegate. At home we delegate. At work we delegate. And we are prioritizing and reprioritizing 5 different schedules 100 times a day (and that number is not an exaggeration)!

Mothers can write the textbook on delegation and prioritization. Aren’t these two great qualities of leadership? The qualities of delegating and prioritizing.

Yes, they are.

Harvard Business Review: “To Be a Great Leader, You Have to Learn How to Delegate”.

Economic Times: “the ability to prioritize tasks is a fundamental skill that distinguishes great leaders from the rest”.

As mothers, we have these skills! No need to shy away from leadership positions. We are already leaders. Every. Single. Day. Our ability to overcome obstacles, adapt to change, and stay committed to goals exemplifies grit through and through.

So, to answer the question I’ve been asked weekly this year - how do I do it?

I wake up each day and it falls in place (and sometimes it doesn’t). The priorities are set. Then the priorities shift. The daily routine is never identical. And at the end of the day, I love what I am doing as an entrepreneur and as a mother. I love creating a company that embraces motherhood. And allows moms to grow their careers and their own entrepreneurial passions.

Grit is something to be embrace. To run toward. Be proud of grit!

I love having you on this journey with me! We’re discovering our potential together.

Truly,

Helen